In Solidarity

This week’s news has left me reeling, drained, and feeling physically ill.  If you are not aware of the atrocities being committed against women and children around the world then you should be informing yourself.  If you are not angered by this news, then you need to ask yourself why; because women and children are suffering every day.

In South Africa, the headlines this week have been of the ex-teacher (change the word ‘teacher’ to rapist and sexual predator) who received a sentence of 8 years in jail, and then appealed and walked out smiling; and the 20 year old man who raped a young girl at a restaurant in Pretoria; who was protected and had the restaurant call it an alleged rape when he was caught red handed (I think the new meaning of red handed should be naked because he was actually caught with no clothes on).  These are just the cases that are news worthy.  There are countless horrific acts that are committed daily in South Africa.  Nearly every woman that I know has a story of sexual assault or abuse; we consider ourselves lucky that it was just groping or someone pushing up against us when it could have been a lot worse.  The entitlement, and toxicity of men, and the violent behaviour and feeling that they can treat anyone how they want to needs to stop.  For anyone thinking that this is just a problem in developing countries, the news speaks volumes this week; and this is not a matter of race, or class, or religion: this happens all over the world.

The story headlining the world at the moment is of Dr Christine Blasey Ford who just testified against Brett Kavanaugh (who is the president’s first choice for the empty seat on the Supreme Court).  Dr Ford has spoken out about Kavanaugh’s sexual assault, and had to testify in front of 17 male senators, and only 4 female senators.  She has been praised for her courage.  She is not doing this to become famous; she was terrified, received death threats, and had to put her family into hiding.  She originally wanted to remain anonymous, but after her story was leaked she felt that it was her civic duty to speak out (Link here).  She was criticised because she waited so long to testify against Kavanaugh.  A piece of text that I saw making its rounds on social media said, “I never heard ONE person ridicule ANY men for coming forward with allegations about Catholic priest molestation after 35 years. Not one.”  As a result of this many women and celebrities from around the world are sharing her picture in solidarity and saying that they believe Dr Ford.  Her bravery and courage has been notable, and she has encouraged women around the world to speak out too.

What about the others though?  What about women who can’t afford to have their reputation ruined, or to put their family into hiding.  What about women that have abusers in their family?  What about women who can’t afford to testify? What about women that don’t have a plethora of celebrities saying that they believe them.  What about a judicial system that protects white men?  This news has been traumatising for so many women and victims for so many reasons, but especially for the backlash and abuse that victims receive for testifying and telling the truth.  And people wonder why women don’t come forward sooner.

So for every person who is brave enough to share their story and to testify, and even those that don’t wish to – you are not alone and we are all in solidarity with you.  No one should have to endure such pain, and carry it alone.